A small acknowledgement of what it took to get to this point
Proof of concept
In 2018 I had moved to Watford. My son was little and I was determined to create my own support village there. I am not a fan of baby groups so started my own in the hope of achieving a bigger goal of building a community for women under the name House of Cleo.
The first session was held at Watford Library I hired out one of their rooms for £60. Most attendees brought cake with them. It was a lovely first event and everything went as well as it could have.
My sons grandmother offered free Reflexology and my daughter offered free manicures. We took it in turns to look after each others babies so that every mother had a moment for themselves. It was beautiful and proof that I could actually do this.
I contacted Mothercare and asked to use a space in their store for the baby group they let me use the space for free. The group had such a great vibe. No judgement, no pretence just mothers sharing their experiences of motherhood over tea and cake.
The foundation
I went onto run brunch and supper clubs for women.
Inviting a speaker to talk on topics such as Life as Solo parenting, Money and manifestation, Building a business, and more. I had gift boxes waiting on the table full of pins, vouchers, free sample from local independent female run businesses. We ate delicious food, talked about important topics and hopefully left more informed and with at least one new connection. The conversations that came out if these events were so heartwarming, affirming and real.
Better work bitch
I did everything within my power to get my name out there and have people know what I was doing. I networked my butt off, took part in many workshops, seminars, volunteered to model peoples products, went on a multitude of planning walks with business owners, wrote blogs for other peoples websites, did panel events and mothers meetings all so I could build something worth while, meet some incredible people I could support and get support from.
I would go from a night shift, home, get washed, strap the baby to my chest and then take the tube to Shoreditch to meet other mothers also building their own business. I would spend every spare moment contacting businesses telling them why they should work with me. Contacting every woman I found inspiring to see if they wanted to be part of my female boss feature i was running which showcased women in business.
It was working but it had become clear that the type of environment and support I needed to succeed was not available to me. No matter how many people told me that I needed to change my environment, get proper sleep and have real support, I ignored it and pushed forward stating that I could do it and there was no option but success.
Baby on board
At the end of 2019 I was preparing for a big panel talk in London I had organised for capacity of 1000 people. I became incredibly ill. The GP said it was a super bug, looking back it was probably covid. It took weeks to recover and I had to cancel the panel event and refund all the sold tickets. It felt like a failure.
I then found out I was pregnant. Everything came to a halt. The pregnancy was high risk and had me so sick I couldn't keep down water, I became bed bound and told not to move much which is hard for me because I love a walk.
House of Cleo then became just an Instagram page in the hopes of reviving it once I had the baby.
I started a coaching accreditation but had to put it on hold as I had wildly underestimated how much another child would change my plus having a baby during covid was an experience.
Back to Suffolk
I moved back to Suffolk in 2021 and within months became a solo parent. I became unrecognisable as I lost hair and a lot of weight due to stress and the trauma of the situation I was in. ‘Lighthouse women’s aid’ were incredible during this time. Having one person who understood and could help me advocate for myself, see and point out the patterns of behaviour while I was deep in fight, flight or freeze and rebuilding who I am while dealing with the reality of what has happened to me and my children meant everything.
Reality check
There comes a time when you have to take a step back and really look at your situation and be honest with yourself.
Is the way you are being ‘loved’ the love you would wish for your friends, your children or even yourself?
Is the life you are living the life you want for your children and yourself?
Are the people around you facilitate negative behaviours or supporting you in a positive way?
Can you do this everyday, is this the life you want for yourself? Can you find joy and truly be content In this current situation?
Learn from the past
20242 the children and I moved into a house that allowed us to breath and be.
The first and only room I decorated was the kids room. I bought a bright sofa and other furniture to bring colour and comfort to the space. I turned the box room into an office in the hopes of using it for coaching calls and building a community.
In late 2024 I contacted the coaching accreditation and explained my situation and asked to continue and they said yes. It was tough but I completed that life coaching accreditation this early this year in the exhausted pockets of tithe after the kids were in bed. It was some of the tasks in the course that made it abundantly clear that the situation I was in was not sustainable and leaving was the only option but me being me I wanted to make sure I had tried everything before walking away. I am now at the beginning stages of building my therapeutic practice.
March 2025 on international women’s day I held the first Cake and Connect meet-up as The Joy of Collective.
Previously I had the right idea at the wrong time but now it’s the right idea at the right time and I’m excited to see where it goes.
There has been many obstacles I’ve faced and there will definitely be more to come. Looking back on what I’ve managed to create with the stolen pockets of time sat in my car before work or walking from work to the car I am proud of past me for being stubborn about the vision and achieving it. I appreciate where I am now.
I want to bring the brunch and supper club to Ipswich as I know a lot of women would benefit from it. Plus it’s nice to have a reason to get out the house. I am extremely excited for the future and what I aim to build and the positive impact it will have. I don’t expect it to be easy but I’m going to give it all I’ve got and some.
The Big Plan
To build a community for women who are truly there for each other.
To build a therapeutic practice where I offer personal coaching, Hypnotheraphy and counselling to women and children.
Create events that help women connect with themselves, try something new, meet new people, and learn new skills.
Build ‘THE VILLAGE’ in a semi rural area. A community of houses with designated outbuildings for a gym, spa, media suite, clubhouse for the kids, and creative studio. There will be a community garden where the produce from the garden will be used in our community café for our seasonal menu. The cafe showcases local talent and collaborates with businesses. There is so much more to this Village life dream but I'll leave it there for now and leave you with this. What you went through isn’t all you are it just informs the person you are now. If there is something you wish to do, build and you cannot stop thinking about it, that’s a clear sign to start making it happen. Slow and steady is better than never starting at all.